BEING MYSELF

  where love begins...

   A journey from losing myself in love to finding peace in being truly seen.

   Is it getting used to it that holds a person back, or is it not getting used to it? I think they're both dangerous to each other. It is difficult to connect to the things that are left. And love gathers them all under its roof. What to get used to, what not to get used to, what to connect to, and what to stay away from are determined by them, instead of us. So what is it that makes us feel love? Is it our heart or our mind?  Or is it someone else's feelings?

   Sometimes, not being able to no, sometimes not wanting to hurt. We are hurting ourselves because of feelings like these. We are watching the waste of our time as a main character. Where was it seen that the main character died? Isn't it amazing that it's actually we who are doing all these evil things to ourselves?

We have convinced ourselves that love is such a thing, and we continue to believe it. "If you can't say no, you probably love him." However, it has never been seen in a book that the side characters give intelligence to the main characters. Because the leads are already the leads because they make their own decisions themselves. So why can't you decide what you want to do?

Sometimes you're aware of the danger, but you're too weak to stop it. And suddenly the universe brings someone out in front of you. The angel turns into the devil, you think. This person will be so good for you that you will understand your true value. He will make you love yourself. He will make you feel the love you haven't seen. Sometimes it will feel so good that you will exaggerate him in your mind.

Quietly, without rushing. He walked right into the center of my life, as if they had always belonged there. He didn’t speak in grand declarations or try to make a scene. He simply was. The parts I had forgotten, suppressed, and neglected. It turned out. And he showed me that without even trying. He really listens to people. Not just the words, but the feelings underneath them. When he looks into your eyes, he sees past the mask. When I speak to him, time doesn’t stop—it becomes meaningful. Every second feels full, honest, and kind. He notices the smallest things. A tiring day, annoying people, stressful jobs... someone who can understand all this just by looking at you. But he never pointed it out to embarrass me. He just stays. Silently, but surely. His smile warms me, but it’s not just the smile that captures me. It’s the way he exists without harming anyone. Strong without being harsh, honest without being cruel. I never feel less when I’m around them. I don’t have to prove myself. I don’t have to earn love.

I just have to be me.